sorry it's been so long......feeling awful and need a new body:(.

From: Colette (luckylady379@aol.com)
Mon Aug 13 09:14:55 2001


I'm so sorry it's been so long ! I've been reading everyday, but i've been in my own little world of self pity poor me! And I did'nt want to pull you guys in my little depressed world! I once again thought of jumping off the bridge< still think of that sometimes!! Well we finally got health insurance its ok but god forbid if i need to go to the ER because thats $100co-pay yikes! But i did make an appt. with a gasteroligist but thats not until sept 28th. So in the mean time what should i do? I am literally starving myself afraid to eat for fear i won't poop! By the time i see this doc. he is going to want to addmitt me, believe me i'm losing weight fast! I wonder if this has anything to do with my past i was anorioxic(sp)! I feel for HelenC. i too can get so tired and my joints feel awful very hard to move but i force myself because my kids need me but believe me sometimes i think it would be better for them with out me! I know most of my problem is lack of nutrition and its very hard for me to look at food! My husband has tried goodies choc. chip cookies candy something and no can do! I think that my intestenal problems has caused me an eating disorder is that possible? Our health insurances is called Uniteded health Most of the co-pays are $10 for mentel health out patient is $25per visit $100 dollars for ER unless they keep me which i would beg them so they would waive the $100! Well my back is killing me sorry for whinning! Love ya all! Colette

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