Laura A Johnsrud wrote:
> Rhonda,
>
> I've heard that song and dance all day today. "You must be feeling better
> because you're smiling" or "here all day" or "not complaining" or "don't look
> sick". Everyone has 1,001 lines. They don't understand, but then again, I
> guess I don't expect them to understand. Some days, no matter how much pain I'm
> in, I just decide that I need to pretend that my body is "normal". I am going
> out to a concert tonight, which I haven't done in months. I know that I am
> going to be in that much more pain tomorrow because I have pushed myself beyond
> my limits today, but I'll think about that tomorrow. Those thoughts that creep
> in every once in a while like "what did I ever do to deserve this" can wait. I
> need my night of freedom. Then I will go back and resume the fight. Does that
> sound completely insane?
>
> Laura
>
> ____________________Reply Separator____________________
> Subject: Re: Appearances Can Be Deceiving...
> ____________________Reply Separator____________________
> Author: <adhesions@obgyn.net>
> Date: 12/3/99 3:10 PM
>
> At Fri, 3 Dec 1999, Rhonda wrote:
> >
> >Yesterday someone made the comment to me that because I don't look sick,
> >I will have a hard time convincing a doctor that I'm truly in pain and
> >need to have my adhesions dealt with. I do take the time some days to
> >put on make-up because it makes me feel better. I also dress relatively
> >well. I work in a conservative law firm so I can't wear jeans to work.
> >I've been overweight for years so I'm not exactly skin & bones.
> >
> >The person that said this to me said that she can't even tell when I'm
> >in pain. I work very hard to make myself look presentable and I have
> >the "stiff upper lip" mentality so I'm not one to allow casual/business
> >acquaintances to know I'm feeling. Am I to be penalized by the doctors
> >just because I don't look like I'm at death's door and because my manner
> >is almost always sunny? I was raised to never allow my personal feelings
> >to show to anyone other than immediate family.
> >
> >Ordinarily someone else's opinion wouldn't concern me but this person is
> >usually right on the money when it comes to things of this nature. It
> >really bothers me that I'm being judged on this basis.
>
> I do the same thing, except got the weight ;oss, I am like you, I get up
> and put make up on every morning for me and my husband, but more for
> myself.
> Alot of people tell me the same thing, they cannt tell am in pain. I
> try to be cheerfull around people, and I lay lowerat home. I still am
> disgusted that the last thing my gyn said was that he and a generl
> surgeon will have to go back in, and he would be callling me, and the
> pain dr told me more or les that it could get WORSE, and that I guess
> the drs will no mess with me, I would like to hear it from his own
> mouth, I have an appt for dec. 13th, maybe he is waiting to talk to me
> then. O h well, he also has seemed like he waiting and stalling me til
> new barriers come out. Take care!
>
> Kepp on smiling! :) Toni
>