I hope you're able to get some help locally with the depression and coping. I hope your hubby realizes you didn't mean to hurt him, and that you're just in pain, physically and emotionally, and going a little crazy from the stress of it all.
Hugs, Gina
At Thu, 28 Oct 1999, toni welsh wrote:
>
>I hate to write to any of you this morning, but I have no where to turn
>now. My 18 yera anniversary is Saturday, and or relation ship is
>falling apart fsat. I do not think I can deal with this day alone,
>after a awful night last night. I have cried so much, when I got up I
>could not open my eyes, they were not this swollen since grandma died in
>June.
>
>I cannot beleive the way the evening went, first I had my handicapped
>sister and I was trying to bath her, she is 140, and I weigh 97 now, she
>is rough, then her and I came out to the kitchen, and my son went out to
>light the gas grill, when he turned it on and hit the switch, I looked
>out and I saw a huge ball of yellow, and he yelled, and he could not
>see, it happened so fast I did not know what happened. He was fine, but
>it had scared him too. Well, since that happened my husband got angry,
>making fun of me, and out of the blue, I told him I do not love him
>anymore, and I removed my rings, and told him I do not want them any
>more. I do not know why I said this, he has shut me off for a few days,
>but I have kept my dealing with things with me to my self. I would go
>on forever if I talked about this, but I think the marriage is rocky as
>hell, and now I am scared, if I lose my husband all I have is dad and my
>son, his girlfriend who I adore hurt me too! I feel like my life is
>over, as I type this, THE TEARS WILL NOT DRY, I CANNOT KEEP CRYING LIKE
>THIS! WHERE DO YOU GO WHEN LIFE GETS TO BE TOO MCH. SOO SCARED!
>The arguing did not stop most of the night, too long, I am now convinced
>men do not uderstand!
>
>I paged my counselor, and she could not talk and when she called back, I
>missed hercall. Hate to bother them after hours!