Kim, i too suffer from adhesion's. like u how does one operation cause so much grieve in ones life. i had got to the point of killing my self, until i was visited by the Holy spirit that made me realize that my life did not belong to me but to the Lord and i had no right to take it away. the only thing that i have to hold on to Kim is the fact that God hears our prayers and we must hold on. i think the one Scripture that sticks in my head is the one that said he would not put no more on us than he knows we can bare. i am to the point now that God has a plan for my life, even in the pain. just like with u he is able to use me to help comfort some of the people that may be in the same shape i am in.i think the other thing Kim is this debilitating illness has change my life, to look more like Christ, the love and compassion that i now have for people is so much more than before. i like u, had every thing, a good job at G.m. retired, now i am about to lose my health care and all the other benefits that i had with them. Oh u don't know where i am with all this, i need my health care, i am in and out of the emergence room all the time just for pain. i was also tagged as a person that just wanted drugs. , but now i don't care what they think i know who i am and i know that i am in pain, so there it is.i hope that i could be of some help to u , and remember i can not do this with the Lord. i don't know where u are with him however if u don't know him u don't have nothing to lose to try him. love Ann
________________________________________ From: IAS Admin (Tracy) <email@example.com>
-- ________________________________________ To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS <firstname.lastname@example.org> Sent: Friday, October 9, 2009 11:53:51 PM Subject: New here, long rant From: email@example.com (Kimberly) Subject: New here, long rant
I had a laparoscopy for "endometriosis" in August 2008. I woke up from the surgery in excruciating pain and with constant gas. Weeks went by and the constant gas did not stop. You could hear it in my belly like a fish tank. The gas actually liquified. Its the worst pain I could ever have imagined. When I went back to the doctor he told me that I would never be satisfied and that he fixed me. I ended up having adhysolysis in January 2009 but the gas pain persisted and moving my bowels began becoming even more difficult. I have been hospitalized for pain atleast 15 times since the first surgery which I developed c-diff from.
I am 33 years old with a 3 year old daughter and a husband. The pain has been so debilitating that I have needed help with my daughter and now my whole family lives with my mom and dad so we can be together even though my husband works. We are paying a mortgage on a house we never live in because I can't raise my daughter alone in pain while my husband works. Recently, we went to a doctor to bring on my period since I never got it after the first surgery in 2008.
Apparently the adhesions bound my uterus to my bladder, my intestines to each other and my ovary to itself. At that doctor appointment we were shocked to learn that I am pregnant. When I ended up in the hospital for pain again, they put a lot of pressure on me to abort the baby and stopped my medication cold turkey. I denied the abortion because I just couldn't live with myself if I did it. When I got home from the hospital, I made a terrible decision and tried to medicate myself. It was hard to go from xanax and dilaudid to tylenol so I took 14 benedryl to sleep. I had not slept in over a week. What I didn't know was that it wouldn't put me to sleep but would make my heart race and I would hallucinate. I reported myself to 911. No one was home at the time. When I got to the hospital I was reported to DYFS for endangering a fetus and being a danger to my 3 year old.