Re: Lori & Chrissie Intimacy-feelings

From: Nancy E. Hale (
Sun Jul 14 13:07:27 2002

I haven't lost the "urge", girls, but I sure have lost the ability to face the agony I know it will cause. Sometimes the pleasure isn't worth the pain, and I am definitely not into S & M ;-)

As for doing things with the family, yes, I do it too. August 3rd my minister is getting married. Unfortunately, that is also the day of our local demolition derby, which is what brought my Other Half and I together 6 years ago. If I were "normal", I could and would attend both. However, my Other Half will have to be at the derby field bright and early that morning, and will not be able to leave the grounds until the derby is over and the last gun is fired. I no longer drive myself, so I do not have the option of taking our vehicle and going to the wedding myself and then returning to the derby, and I refuse to miss the derby. My minister and his wife-to-be will have lots of friends and loved ones around for their wedding day, and I'm sure they will not miss my presence. However, Chester will have only me there to share the derby with, and I will not back out on him, no matter how badly it hurts to be there. So, I will take one of our canvas lounge chairs and stretch out on it on the utility trailer in the shade of a tarp and enjoy the smashing, crashing, action that has been a part of our lives together, while making sure that my meds and lots of ice water are close beside me. And on Sunday I am sure that I will spend a large part of the day on the sofa with my cross-stitch in my lap between naps and meds.

We all know what each of us has given up because of the pain of adhesions, and we each have to make our own choices. My loved ones (most of them at least) know what it costs me to participate in a family outing. The good days are great, and filled with activities that we used to enjoy, and the bad days are rotten and depressing for everyone. I try to encourage my Other Half and my stepson to do things without me on those days.

This life is no fun. But at least we have found others who understand what we are dealing with and who are willing to share what has worked for them.

Gentle pain-free hugs to you both,

Nancy in NB

Enter keywords:
Returns per screen: Require all keywords: