Re:Reply-to: katemm@mindspring.com

From: Kate Murphy (katemm@mindspring.com)
Wed Jan 24 12:29:20 2001


<FontFamily><param>Times New Roman</param><bigger>On 24 Jan 2001, at 9:11, Terri Lynch wrote:

<bold><color><param>0000,0000,8000</param><bigger><bigger>Hi everyone. I really need some prayers my way. This disease has really gotten to me and my family.

<smaller>Dear Terri,

There is little more stressful on a family than chronic illness. I had only been married a year when I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and then, in the following year, colon cancer.

There were times I wanted to scream, run away, hide . . . and I just knew my husband couldn't understand. We've been married now for more than twenty years, almost all of them full of illness. Somehow, he decided to be with me and support me, and I love him dearly for all he has given up to be with me.

When I thought I had a recurrence of breast cancer, he was upset that I kept it to myself and didn't tell him right away. "We're in this together."

However, it took a long time and lots of soul-searching on both our parts to get to this point. When I was first trying to cope, I blamed him for things he couldn't fix and I couldn't control. I was depressed and angry -- and, quite frankly, a bitch a lot of the time.

I am glad that your husband has decided to stick with you until this surgery. However, remember that surgery is NOT always the answer. Don't hang all your hopes and his hopes on it.

If he won't go to a counselor, go by yourself so you can learn how to cope with your illness and what it means to your marriage.

It hurts a lot when the people we care most about don't understand our pain and frustration, but it happens more than you can know.

Kate</bold></color><smaller>

<nofill> Kate Murphy katemm@mindspring.com


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