Re: Sue, I am begging you to re-consider your surgery on April 11!

From: Bev (bnb@new.rr.com)
Sat Apr 5 10:31:44 2003


Hello Sue,

I saw your post of yesterday and I actually became nauseated when I read it! If I did not respond to it based on what I know about ARD, my guilt would be etched in my mind forever, thus I will respond to it.

I am going to be very upfront in this email, I am going to ask you to postpone your surgery of April 11!

You say that you have not posted for awhile, and that tells me that you are no stranger to the issues on the IAS board, yet you seem to be unaware of the danger your facing by allowing this surgery!

There exists in this surgery only a fraction of a chance, that you will secure any resolution or relief in your symptoms or in your pain levels with this surgery in fact, your have about a 99.9% chance of the surgery being successful! If you pursue this without allowing yourself to be educated about ARD and all the surgical risks involved in it, your going to be worse off for having it, you MUST be informed, and PLEASE get a second opinion immediately! !

All I am asking of you, begging you, is that you allow yourself the time to become educated as to the risks involved in THIS surgery, Sue, and please trust me when I say to you that you will be best served to take the time to ask questions before going into this surgery! If you find that this surgery by this surgeon offers you something, then you can always re-schedule it, I am sure no surgeon will deny the opportunity to make some money, after all surgery is their income and they will sell it with the same diligence a shoe salesman sells shoes! No mater if they will hurt your feet or not, or cripple you, a sale is a sale, and commission is a commission! You can reschedule!!

There is less then a handful of surgeons here in the USA who can offer a skilled adhesiolysis that will offer you the improvements you seek! And even with them, it is risky! I can assure you that once you allow yourself to become informed as to what makes an adhesiolysis effective, as effective as it can be that is, you will agree that your surgeon cannot offer you that! If I am wrong, prove me wrong! Please! Sue, it doesn’t matter how prestigious the surgeon is, or how important his position and how much knowledge he has in an area of surgery or medicine, or whether it is performed in one of the "TOP" medical centers either...in fact, just by you thinking that your going to get improvements in his surgery tells me he has not been forthright in explaining things to you! Yes, I am saying he has not been honest with you about this surgery, not at all! If he had been, he wouldn't be going through with it, and most certainly you would not be!

Just give me, and others, a chance to educate you enough so that you can become informed as to whether this is the right surgery and surgeon for you...please, please do this before it is to late to save and protect yourself from a life of sheer living hell!

Sue, listen to me, I know your suffering, in pain, and expecting this surgeon to offer you help, it will not happen that way! You will not be any worse for waiting a week longer and securing information about this surgery and surgeon, it can only serve to help you...if you still feel it is the best thing for you, then go for it, but NOT before you ask questions..please!

There is little more I can say to you, but at least I tried. I know I am a stranger to you, and your asking yourself why listen to me, what do I know about you, about your surgeon, the answer is that even as a stranger to you, I DO know about the surgery and the surgeon, and I do know you will be harmed, all you have to do is talk to me, allow me a little time to explain myself to you and why I am writing this to you! Maybe others will come on and say it like it is, the truth, the whole truth and nothing but! That is what this site is for, to save a life from being destroyed by surgeons like this who there are by far to many of in existence! He should be ashamed of himself…

Unfortunately ( but fortunately for the victims of ARD over all though ) I have to go to Europe on April 8 - 14th for a medical congress on, of all things, “ peritoneal adhesions” or " post surgical adhesions!", but we have this weekend and Monday, and I will put you in touch with others who can offer you answers as well...for now, please listen to me, if you do not want to communicate with me, then go in the IAS Adhesion Quilt and read some of those stories, you will get an education there. Post questions on the IAS message board, get your answers from there if you do not want to listen to my words, as in fact, my words are only touching on the tip of the iceberg your about to be sunk by! I do not share this for me, I will not be the one who’s life will be impacted by this surgery, only yours will, but I know how it will be impacted and it is far worse then any of our words can express, far worse then there are even words for!

Sue, your no better off with this surgeon then the rest of us where with the surgeons who did this to us...I know 100% that you will only be worse for this surgery, and then who will you be able to turn to? I say this as I did it too, and someone told me these same things, I didn't listen, I thought my surgeon was the best, he THOUGHT he was the best, and I only got worse for the surgery! Today I live with more disabling non- reversible medical problems then had before I had surgery to HELP me...

If you think your symptoms will be resolved by having your appendix, gallbladder and ovary out, your sadly mistaken! How do you think the adhesions got there in the first place? SURGERY!! It is only going get worse for this surgery...and you say that you will not know what has happened to until you wake up from the surgery, well, I know!

My God, Sue, think about it, if you got adhesions from a surgery, and your in pain from THAT surgery, and your suffering so bad now as a result of the prior surgeries, what kind of pain do you think you will be in from another surgery by an unskilled surgeon? How many places inside of you where he removes organs will the adhesions developed & form? They WILL form at every single site where he cuts...and then if he doesn't perform a meticulous homeostasis at the end of your procedure, adhesions will form on every speck of blood he leaves in you! And if he has to do a long incision, a laporotomy, you develop adhesions all along the underside of that scar, and you might herniate, (or blow open the abdominal muscle from the weakening of the incision) then adhesions develop on the urinary bladder, and when you start to have bladder problems like Tammy Habhegger and Karla Nygren ( see IAS quilt) your sunk, no turning around!

If your feeling uncomfortable reading this, then think a minute that IF it is true, even part of it, is this surgery what you want to chance?? Irene, it is ALL true, please think!

Your chances of developing adhesions in the area of the gall bladder, appendix and ovary are ONLY about 97% - 99%!! If you go through with this surgery your symptoms will be 100 times more intense and excruciating then before you went in for this surgery...and when you realize it, it will be to late and non reversible!

You laugh when you mention Superman, well this surgery is nothing like Reeves had, but then again, you won't be much different then him anyway, only you will be able to walk, but not much! Even Superman doesn't like the quality of life he has to endure now, Irene, but he has no choice now, YOU DO!

Get educated, please..show this letter to your husband and father, to your surgeon, your surgeon can call me as well, even collect. You can call me collect if you like.

If you do nothing more then tell your surgeon you want the adhesiolysis procedure done via laporoscope and not open surgery as that can be offered elsewhere in the USA and aborad, and if he is not skilled enough to do it, your best served to wait and check out a surgeon who can offer it, one who HAS the skill to offer it! You would not hesistate to do this if it were for your husband, or if it were brain or heart surgery would youZ? Adhesiolysis is just as serious if not more so! Ask to read the "Surgery Consent Form" with your surgeon in his office well before the surgery date and ask him if adhesions are a risk in this surgery, and if so, what are your chances of having them form in the surgery, also tell him that you will be securing your operative reports, and any associated pathology reports, why not get your pre-diagnostic reports regarding the need of a surgery. If it is simply for cysts, Irene, an ovary doesn't necessarily have to be removed due to cysts, you NEED a second opinion my dear as your heading into some dangerous territory. Show him information on ARD and surgery’s, ask how effective his adhesiolysis procedures are and can you talk to any of those he was successful with, and how many laporoscopic adhesiolysis procedures does he do in a year? Have you asked any of these questions?

You say you have suffered for 10 years now and your tired of it? If you think you are suffering now, your in for a rude awaking, Sue, your suffering is about to begin, and it will be due to this surgery! If you haven't gotten well in a surgery prior to this one...then why do you think you will now?

I have had ARD for over 20 years, and 52 years old and have no urinary or bowel control due to surgeries where the surgeon was going to help me...I may be a stranger to you my dear Sue, but I am NO stranger to ARD, in fact I am quite acclimated to it not only as a victim of ARD but as a fierce patient advocate and I do know what I am talking about, I know it 100%, and I am offing ways to help you, my God, let me help you!

If my words bring you to tears and frustration and fear, I apologize for that, But I do not apologize if it makes you think and if it impress’s upon you to post pone this surgery so that you can secure more information on ARD, then it is worth my efforts and strong approach to you on this issue. Also know that if there is so much as an ounce of wondering if maybe I am right in all of this, then postpone it until you are 100% certain this surgery is what you need! Okay? Think…just allow yourself time to think about this before you go through with it, I know your suffering and wanting a quick way out, but this is not that way, Sue, it most certainly is not that way out!

I am also begging everyone who reads this to please reach out to Sue and share with her the reality of what happened in your past that brought you to this site! Do you think Sue would benefit from becoming her own best Dr. and get educated to ARD before she allows this surgeon to do her “pumpkin” adhesiolysis!

Prayers are good to ask for, Sue, and maybe these responses are meant to be the answers to your prayer!

In sincere friendship, Beverly

At Fri, 4 Apr 2003, Sue wrote: >
>Hi All:
>
>I haven't posted for a couple of weeks because I was feeling better and
>then wham! I got sick again over the weekend. This time much worse.
>Went to doc and had ultrasound done. What a surprise to find that I had
>multiple cysts on my ovary. They are doing pain mapping under conscious
>sedation and then they are going to remove my only ovary left. Also if
>necessary, they will take my appendix and my gall bladder. I won't know
>anything till I wake up from surgery. I pray that this solves my
>problem. After 10 years of suffering and 8 surgeries, I am so tired of
>fighting. I lost my mother in September of 2002, so this will be much
>more difficult for me to go through. I have my husband and my father,
>but no one can replace a mother. The one good thing is that I have
>excellent doctors. My obgyn doc will be doing most of the surgery,
>however if there are adhesions on my bowel or my appendix or gall
>bladder needs to be removed, the gen surgereon will take over.
>Fortunately this gen surgereon is the one who operated on Christopher
>Reeves a couple of weeks ago. So if he is good enough for Superman,
>he's good enough for me. HA HA. Please pray for me!
>
>--
>Sue
>


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