Good morning! I hope that you've all had a good night's sleep! Unfortunately (sigh) I didn't, (sigh) I had forgotten to take my methadone the day before (oops! Yes I know! I'm a "DINGBAT") and I think that was part of the reason - I was feeling very anxious and agitated last night. So, I tossed and turned.
I'm feeling very tired, but decided not to sleep this morning, besides I had to read all the new messages on the board.
When we sat down to breakfast - we had made pancakes the previous night - as I had not felt like making anything for dinner - and since we had plenty left over - we had them for breakfast. I ate almost one - then felt sick - and ended up rushing to the toilet to dispose of it! (LOL) Oh well, never mind!
THEN - after John left I wanted to water my herbs which I have in pots on my back deck - by the kitchen door - and as I bent down to water them the door slammed shut in the wind - and the door knob slammed into my head. OUCH!
It hurt for a little while - but the headache's gone now. I didn't tell John, I will tell him tonight when he gets home - you know how he worries about me! he'll tell me off, but that's ok, no real harm done - it's not like I've got that many brain cells left! (ROFL)
Gosh, sometimes it is good to make fun at yourself!
I've been making a list of groceries I would like to buy for Christmas, as John has just told me he's getting a bonus - and his boss is putting it into our bank account tonight! Jippy now I can replace the slippers that I ruined the other day - when I washed them in the washing machine - apparently once to often. (Ha ha!)
Boy! Am I good at stuffing up!
Mmmm I'm still so jolly emotional.... and my breasts are very sore....and my brain won't shut up for even 5 minutes....it just keeps going and going....like an Eveready battery.... don't know if you guys see that particular advertisement on tv....
I've just rung my friend Prue - as she's about to leave to go to hospital - she's having her operation this evening. She sounded a little stressed. I'll be thinking of her all day and hoping that finally her wound will heal, and that she won't be so uncomfortable anymore!
I think I'll go do a couple of things now... * I'm going to have a nice long relaxing shower - it's going to rain anyway this weekend so I won't have to feel quilty about using too much rain water. * Then I'm going to put the kettle on - make myself a cup of herbal tea * then I'm going to put my feet up with my nice bread recipe book and decide which delicious and jummy recipe I'm going to follow! * then I'm going to think of what to make for dinner.
Oh dear, it's just started pouring outside - I may have to wait to have my shower - not that it'llmake any difference - since the shower is outside and I'll be getting wet anyway! (now my computer is shaking - 'cos my belly is shaking from laughing!)
I may try to find something nice to eat - I should try at least - I gave myself a cyclizine injection after I threw up this morning - and my stomach feels like it has settled down.
Well, that's it for right this minute,
Love to you all,
-- Lin
-- Thank you Karla,I agree! Why do I have to have a Pain Specialist? I was talking to John about the same thing last night, and I said to him too - can't I simply say next time I am admitted that I don't need my P.S.? That Dr Robertson and I are handling the situation just fine and that I am perfectly happy with how my pain management is going? It's just that everytime in the past when I've gone into hospital I've run into the same situation - the doctors and nurses act like my P.S. word is LAW! And they won't prescribe anything for my pain - but leave it to him instead. I don't want to cause a problem, I really don't want to upset my P.S. by demanding that I want another P.S. - he's basically a nice guy - and in a way he does care about me, it's just that on this matter we don't see eye to eye. I've been wandering about writing to Dr Robertson and expressing my concerns and to aks him what to do? What do you think? Or am I making a too big a deal out of this? The other thing I blurted out to John last night was that I wished I could simply stop taking the methadone - I'm down to 7 mg's - and at the rate I am going - dropping it 1 mg a month - it's going to take me another 7 months - it seems like forever. I know that if I stop taking it that i will feel absolutely terrible - I'll have weeks of withdrawl to deal with and I will be impossible to live with. I've done it a couple of times before and believe me - I'm intolerable to be around when I'm withdrawing! I can't sit still, can't think straight, can't sleep. And then, I may be pregnant - and I don't want to risk anything going wrong. It's just that in 14 days I have to ring my P.S. up for another prescription - and the first thing he's going to ask me is what medications I am taking. Karla, I don't want to lie to him - I don't like being dishonest - but last month when I said that I was taking morphine it got me into hot water - and that's when he basically put his foot down and said he wouldn't prescribe it as he wanted me off all the narcotics. John suggested that I simply say to him "the same as last month" and hope that he wont catch on, I know technically it's not lying - but I'd still feel bad about it. I wish I could change to another P.S. who was more sympathetic to my needs, someone who isn't too busy to listen to me - but all the other P.S.'s are no better! I don't know what to do, I really don't.
Hugs
Lin