I had to teach myself to trust that my pain was less, and a great deal less, my body and actions told me so, BUT in my mind I was so scared of that adhesion pain or even having to face that pain if they came back that I wasn't even sure I wanted off the pain pills for fear I would have to confront that issue...over time I became more and more active, I was busier and busier...and soon I wasn't even thinking of the adhesions or adhesion pain, and I sure wasn't finding time to take medications... It has been almost 1 1/2 years for me and when I think about the adhesion pain I do feel an anxiety as that was the worst experience in my life physically...and it scares me to think of ever living that way again!! So it is natural to feel some anxiety, agree? I do take over counter Sominex at night yet as I sleep better with that and having had a hysterectomy with my adhesiolysis, I have elected not to take any hormone replacement, I do however take vitamin E & C+D & Calcium, but no prescriptions. When I started to suffer sleep, I decided to continue to take the Sominex, and I go to bed at 10pm and am up for work at 6amand rested!!
Every now and then, I feel some uncomfortable feeling, not really pain, but I know that I had ARD for years...but it is not adhesion pain, BUT tell my mind that!!! Man, if I have gas pain or stomach cramping from good old sauerkraut..well, I am sure I have the adhesions back until I let a big ol FAR...well, you know what I mean..and then I know it isn't the adhesions..talk about still suffering from ARD..sure we do! You can't turn your emotions off like a water faucet, but over time and experience, your mind will catch up to your body and you will then be able to accept that maybe you did beat this thing!!
I am still waiting though as that is easier for me to ignore it then to accept that I have indeed beat it..I told myself that if I make it through November 2000 and the adhesion pain has not returned, THEN I am an Adhesion Survivor!!! But I still hold my breath at times..and for no reason physically!!!!
I once shared with another IAS member over the telephone when we were discussing this very issue of that lingering fear that comes from months and years of suffering horrible chronic pain...and then FEELING well, but not being able to THINK that it is real! I said that we never really are cured of ARD, as we may think we are an Adhesion Survivor , but we really become Adhesion Psychotics as we react to very ache and pain we get for fear its back!!! And who can blame us!!!! :-)
Chrissy, if this is a prescription, discuss this outlook with with your DR. and see what can be worked out as weaning you off them. Another thing is this, my dear...IF you do experience adhesion pain, then you will know to deal with it right away and Dr. Jay is only an email away to walk you though it. Your not alone in your fear...and the good news is that it is still possible to help you get releif from this disease..just because you try to cover it up if it is there dosn't mean it will go away, so pride yourself with dealing with it IF it does come back...we all face that as well!
Hope that helps some!
>----- Original Message -----
From: Chrissy <Chrissy492@aol.com> To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS <adhesions@mail.medispecialty.com> Sent: Monday, October 09, 2000 11:00 AM Subject: Having an Oxycontin problem
> Hi my friends,
> I'm having a problem coming off of the oxycontin pills. I started
> taking them over a year ago. First it was at 80 mgs. for almost the
> whole year - then down to 40mgs. Now that I have had my surgery with
> Dr. Reich and Dr. Redan of course I don't need the pills for the pain
> because my pain is not that bad. But OUCH am I having a hard time not
> taking them. I have only a few left and I am actually panicing that I
> don't have another prescription. I don't know if I am afraid not to
> take them because I remember the awful pain I had before I was on them,
> or my body is craving them.....I don't know which is worse. I fight NOT
> to take the pill cause I know I won't get anymore. My God if I knew it
> would be this hard before I started taking them I don't know if I would
> chose to take them. But at the time I started taking them I wanted
> something, anything just to get rid of some of the pain. What am I to
> do? I feel awful......I know this is not as bad as pain, but wow what a
> trick it's playing on my mind.
> with hugs and love,
> Chrissie xo
>