I do know exactly what you are talking about. My life is changing so rapidly that I can measure it by the weeks. I had my last surgery in Aug 2002, and from there on I can tell you week by week how the adhesions have grown. I used to be able to work out regularly and live a very full life. But little by little I am unable to do much at all. I find myself laying in bed more and more. Thank God for TV! I am in pain management now and I have tried to work out with the pain meds in me, this only aggrivates my adhesions to the point that I end up in bed for a couple of days. I am unable to go shopping for groceries any more. The last couple of times that I went, I ended up hurting so bad that even my breakthru meds didn't work. I know the vicious cycle that you are in. On a good day, I might be able to do some laundry and the dishes, but by the end of the afternoon, I'm in such agony that I'm useless and end up laying in bed the whole next day. All this started happening right after my last laporoscopy in Aug. At first I thought that it was just healing and taking longer, but then after it had healed and the pain was getting worse, I realized that the adhesions had gotten so much worse. I now have them on my liver (well, I knew that they were there for some time) and now a new place, on my right kidney. When I have to go pee, I can feel pulling and tearing on my right side. At first I thought that it was my liver or something, but after tests and cat-scans, my liver appeared to be fine. So I went to a doctor for the kidney and that was fine also, except you cannot see adhesions. But they said no stones, or blood or infection. That leaves one thing and that is adheions. I've never had them there before and it hurts like hell every time I pee. My gyno thinks that the adhesions have wrapped from my intestines around to my urethra (sp) and onto my kidney. This doctor actually has given me his blessing to go to a pain management doctor. I got a new surgeon and he won't do another surgery on me but is in agreement that I should be in pain management. I've never had a doctor believe in me the way that these two do. They talk often to each other and share thier knowledge and share my records with each other. And my pain doctor is in on it to. He also is in agreement with my surgeon and gyno. I finally have a team of docs trying to help me. It's very hard living with adhesions, but I know that in the end, if I can just get to Germany I will be okay. I am actively trying to get the money now to go with my fiance. We are very encouraged by the number of people who have already gone and are painfree for the most part. This is our hope! Jenny, when I started coming to this site in November 2002, I didn't even know that others were out there just like me. I had one really close girlfriend and even she gets tired of me talking about my pain. She wants to go shopping or out dancing and I can't. Now she comes to visit me and expects to sit on the couch or on my bed. You have a new friend here....ME! I know that I speak for all of us.....you are welcome and loved here and you have all of us as friends. It's hard to live with this, but having my extended family helps so much. I've learned more about adhesions than some of my docs used to know. I've shared this info with them and they are actually coming to this site to see what I'm talking about and then we discuss it together. That's wonderful!!! More doctors need to be like this. But any ways, I'm writing a book now.....got to be the meds ....LOL....I get so talkative on them LOL. My fiance is very caring also and he takes me out once a week also for our weekly DATE. It does brighten up my weeks....most of them are very lonely while he's at work, but we are very fortunate to have this support at home. Not everyone does. It's sad but true. Take care and I hope that I haven't bored anyone to tears. I really just wanted to talk to someone today and you and I are similar, so there it is! Hope you are having a painfree moment.....it would be asking too much for a painfree day!!! :-)
Take care and God bless you, A new friend, Tonya
>----- Original Message -----
From: Jenny <jenklow@hotmail.com>
To: Multiple recipients of list ADHESIONS <adhesions@mail.medispecialty.com>
Sent: Tuesday, February 04, 2003 5:30 AM
Subject: My Posts
> Hello Everyone,
>
> I hope you are all having pain free days. I just wanted to say I'm
> sorry if my posts are more like a book. I have not posted on here
> regularly in almost 2 years. That is when I decided to start school to
> get my mind off my pain. But since my pain has gotten so bad I can't
> sit through class any more, here I am again. I haven't felt much like
> going any where because I hurt so much. I move from my bed to my couch.
> Anyone else out there like this? My honey is wonderful and tries to get
> me out of the house at least once a week for dinner and a movie, or
> something. This helps me to not get too depressed and lifts my spirits.
> I don't know if anyone else is like this or not, but I have gotten to
> where I don't hardly call any of my friends anymore. I hate when they
> ask me how I feel and I have to say bad, or if I say I'm okay, they know
> I am not really. I just don't want to sound like a whiner or complainer
> to them, so I just don't call. Basically, pain is a major factor in my
> life. I hate even thinking that. Even going through pain management, I
> am limited on what I can do even though I try. And when I do push
> myself to do more than I know I can, then I pay for it in a very bad
> way. So I will try not to complain too much, although I feel like I
> already have. Sorry! I hope to make some friends here. Hopefully I can
> be an encouragement and support to you and brighten your day as you do
> mine. Anyway, I know my posts have been long, so I will make this one
> shorter. Hope you have a great day!
>
> Lots of love,
> jenny
>