no subject received Thu, 21 Feb 2002 08:24:33 -0600

From: Rowdyladyrose@aol.com
Thu Feb 21 07:24:34 2002


> >
> > REAL WOMEN VS. MARTHA STEWART
> >
> > Martha's way #1:
> > Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar
> > cone to prevent ice cream drips.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for
> > Pete's sake, you are probably lying on the couch, with your
> > feet up, eating it anyway.
> >
> > Martha's way #2:
> > To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag
> > with the potatoes.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix and keep it in the
> > pantry for up to a year.
> >
> > Martha's way #3:
> > When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use
> > a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any
> > white mess on the outside of the cake.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > Go to the bakery. They'll even decorate it for you.
> >
> > Martha's way #4:
> > If you accidentally over salt a dish while it's still
> > cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the
> > excess salt for an instant "fix me up."
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too
> > damn bad. Please recite with me, The Real Women's motto: I
> > made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it
> > tastes.
> >
> > Martha's way #5:
> > Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the
> > refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > Celery? Never heard of the stuff.
> >
> > Martha's way #6:
> > Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking
> > to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include
> > brushing egg whites over the crust so I just don't do it.
> >
> > Martha's way #7:
> > Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it
> > on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > Martha, dear, the only reason this works is because you
> > can't rub a lime on your forehead without getting lime
> > juice in your eye, and then the problem isn't the headache
> > anymore, YOU'RE NOW BLIND!
> >
> > Martha's way #9:
> > If you have a problem opening jars: Try using latex
> > dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes
> > opening jars easy.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > Go ask the very cute neighbor to do it.
> >
> > Martha's way #10:
> > Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice
> > cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
> > The Real Women's Way:
> > Leftover wine??????

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