Re: I just got another constructive criticism! HA!

From: Lin (j.vermey@xtra.co.nz)
Wed Dec 5 16:56:54 2001

At Wed, 5 Dec 2001, cathy:- wrote: >
>Yes, Karla that makes a lot of sense. I think that it is important to
>realize that what will probably happen is that they will sieze on some
>little tangent that has some ambiguous wording and exploit it into some
>bizarre misreading of the whole letter. At the college that my husband
>teaches at there is a professor who creates these complex fantasies and
>then becomes convinced that they are real. We call it a "Reality
>Distortion Field."
>
>Maybe a better tack would be to add another paragraph. Something along
>the lines of:
>
>3) While the original cause of your problems were abdominal adhesions,
>you have had many surgeries done with the vain hope of correcting the
>adhesions, and then later with the hope of correcting the problems
>caused by the surgeries done in the hope of repairomg the adhesion
>damage. Most of your physical problems are the result of those later
>surgeries.
>
>[At this point picture cathy with Lin's mom in a headlock, rapping on
>her skull calling "HAAAALLLLLLOOOOOOO!!!! ANYTHING IN THERE?!?!?!?!" I
>mean good Lord we are not talking about a hangnail here. Lin is missing
>her large intestine! As in GONE!!! You can argue all you want about how
>common which level of adhesion complications is, but a surgeon opened up
>Lin and removed her bowel and it is GONE! FOREVER! And the same thing
>with you, Karla, I mean some things about adhesions may be controversal,
>but having your kidneys drain into a plastic baggie is a big deal no
>matter what!]
>
>That's what this board is supposed to be -- a place to escape from the
>Reality Distortion Field!
>
>At Wed, 5 Dec 2001, Karla wrote:
>>
>>Cathy,
>>
>>This is great. I would like to change and add a couple things.
>>
>>The change would be from calling adhesions a "rare" complication to a
>>complication that affects all too many people who have undergone surgery,
>>with a number of these individuals suffering from disabling and life
>>threatening side effects. I say this because I believe with Lin's family
>>they would just throw it back in her face and say it's rare....no way Lin
>>has it. Basically, Lin has my family. I have just learned to shut them out
>>and give them limited access to opportunities where they can make attacks on
>>me. They have gotten better over the years as they have seen me in very bad
>>condition at times and I have heard word back that they didn't know I was
>>that bad.
>>
>>The other suggestion would be to put a line about "when John and I have
>>children they will have limited contact with family members because I don't
>>want them exposed to the negative treatment of their mother. My children
>>will be raised with love and nurture and will be taught to both love and
>>respect in return. I want the time that I have with my children to be
>>positive and full of wonderful memories."
>>
>>I don't think I have the wording quite right on that but you get my drift.
>>
>>--
>>Karla
>>
>>Somewhere up in the stars..............
>>My angel and me!
>>
>>http://www.geocities.com/karlasfamily2001
>>http://www.geocities.com/princessd82000/BraydensHaven
>
>--
>cathy :-)
>

--
O gosh! You make me laugh!


I had a vision of Cathy holding my Mum in a headlock, rapping on her
skull - yelling "HAAAALLLLLLOOOOOOO!!!! ANYTHING IN THERE?!?!?!?!"


HAHAHAHAHAHAHA


I'm sorry - I do think it's time that Mum and Dad got a reality check!


You know, I have never even decussed with my family how much I have
grieved for the fact that I ended up having my large intestine removed!


Only John knows how much it has affected me.


I've been putting on a brave front - always putting on a "I'm fine" face!
I AM SO SICK OF PRETENDING EVERYTHING IS A O K when it is not!


And you know - everytime I want to do something - like now - when I've
been thinking of taking that Diploma in Herbal Studies - you know what I
am told?


O Lin! You've never achieved anything!


My family has no faith in me - do you know my mother has never forgiven
me because I lost a gold piece of jewelery - which hung on a necklace
when I was 13?


I'm not worthy of expensive jewelery!


When I bought my flat before John and I got married I borrowed some money
from my parents to pay for the deposit - they charge me 5% interest.
I haven't been able to pay it back - because I lost my job after I got sick


My parents are not badly off - they live in a fantastic house - on an 8
acre property - they have a huge swimming pool, 2 bathrooms, a
beautiful wooden kitchen, they have a grannyflat, etc, etc.


My parents are forever complaining that I haven't paid the loan back.
They claim that they are short of cash - when John and I struggle to
have enough money left over to buy groceries!


My life would be so much easier if they would help John and me out - so
we could get the house in shape - I'd love to have a bathroom - and a
proper kitchen - I don't even have any cupboards - no wardrobe - I
shower outside.


But never an offer.


Oh yes, my Mum has offered to come over with the people she hired to
help her in her garden and around the house - to tidy my pig stye up.
I've never taken her up on it - as I would only get criticism about the
mess! And I just don't need that!


It is time someone set my family straight on a few things - and i think
that person is ME!


Thanks for everything,


Love,


Lin

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