It's hard not to lose faith when you are in pain and there don't seem to be any answers on the horizon. Don't lose hope though -- if you are persistent, you will come across someone who can and will help you. It takes a lot of manure to produce a few flowers. :)
I hope you are on some good pain meds, and that you have people near by who can help out. Will keep you in my thoughts and prayers -- hang in there, things will get better...take care of you.
Love,
Lynda M. in AZ