My doctor did say that the pulled muscle in my groin is probably because of the awkward position he put me in to make sure he got the adhesion connecting my bladder to my abdominal wall (probably then one causing the greatest pain). I love having a doctor that isn't afraid to take the blame for something!
I won't leave you all......now that I (hopefully) will have more energy, maybe I can do more for others. If nothing else, I will continue to provide funnies!
So here you go:
During a children's sermon, a local Priest asked the children what "Amen" means.
A little boy raised his hand and said - "It means "Tha-tha-tha-that's all folks!"
------------------------------------------------------ Yogi Berra: "You mean you get seasick?" Rube Walker: "Do I ever!" Yogi ------------------------------------------------------ Berra: "On water?" - as reported by sportswriter Phil Pepe
-- ------------------------------------------------------ -------------------------------------------------------------------- "In no way is it possible for a person to be in two places at the same -------------------------------------------------------------------- time, especially if there is a great distance in between." - Judge Amado -------------------------------------------------------------------- Guerrero, Mexican Tenth District Federal Court, on a defendant's alibi ------------------------------------------------ "Low earnings seem to be the key reason why someone who usually works ------------------------------------------------ full time is a member of a poor family." - U.S. Bureau of Labor ------------------------------------------------ Statistics conclusions of a study detailing poverty in America -------------------------------------------------- "Some programs have been theatrical masterpieces, but all we're seeing -------------------------------------------------- is the negative side of nuclear war." - Senator Barry Goldwater (R-Ariz) -------------------------------------------------- discussing television shows about the nuclear war -------------------------------------------- "The thing is this- we have incidents happening here all the time." - -------------------------------------------- Department of Energy spokesman at Hanford, Washington, on why no -------------------------------------------- announcement was made on a leak of radioactive material ---------------------------------------------------------------------- "I love sports. Whenever I can, I always watch the Detroit Tigers on ---------------------------------------------------------------------- radio." - President Gerald Ford ---------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------- A boy, frustrated with all the rules he had to follow, asked his father, -------------------------------------------------- "Dad, how soon will I be old enough to do as I please"? --------------------------------------------------The father answered immediately, "I don't know. Nobody has lived that long yet".
---------------------------------------------------------- Did you know that the pyramids were built by Union people? It was ---------------------------------------------------------- originaly designed as a cube. Each shift did a little less till the ---------------------------------------------------------- last said 'throw a rock on top and lets go home'. ------------------------- One day there was a family of 6 and they were going to disney land for ------------------------- their first time and they saw a sign that said Disneyland left so they ------------------------- turned around and went home. ---------------- A policeman spots a woman driving and knitting at the same time. Driving ---------------- up beside her, he shouts out the window - ----------------
"Pull over!"
"No," she shouts back, "It's a scarf!" ------------------------- I know I married Miss Right. ------------------------- I just didn't know her first name was Always. -------------------------
----------------------------------------------- Sometimes I wake up grumpy - Other times I let him sleep. ----------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------------------ ----------------------------------------------- I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
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