Comparing suffering does not work. It cannot honestly be done. Doesn't matter whether it is physical suffering or emotional suffering...it cannot be placed on a scale and weighed. I'd recommend you send one last email to the person and suggest they read, "Man's Search For Meaning" by Victor Frankl. If they read it and still don't get it...we need to feel compassion for them. If the words they say hurt you, Ignore them. Block your email from receiving any from them. You can still hear from everyone else. You suffer enough already. You don't need more added to it. Never put yourself down because you feel your experiences are not worthy when you or someone else unfairly attempts to compare them. It's impossible to compare suffering. You have to be the one who's lived your life in order to comprehend it's meaning in your life. Anyone who puts down or minimizes someone else's experiences is probably going to keep on having experiences because they just don't get it.
As far as going to Washington, I'd be proud to have you go and represent me. First of all I am not very articulate and second it would be difficult for me to get there. You have an understanding of what we've all been through including your own experiences. You obviously care deeply about us all. You could fairly represent us. I think you should go. I feel we need you to go. I also believe you would be great moral support as well as an excellent spokesperson, and I believe there are strength in numbers. Anyone wishing you not to attend; I would thoroughly explore their motives. I'd sure question what truly, honestly, deep down is motivating them...not what they say but deep down. The only reasons I can think of for someone not wanting you to go would strictly be personal glory, spotlight, or other self motivated interests or of course jealousy but that just seems so ridiculous. Is it at all based on who someone has had surgery with or who someone might promote? Anyway, I'm sure whoever else is going would love to have your company, Right?
Anyway, stick around...we all seemed to get raked at one point or another and it's not worth catching fire over. The important people here are all standing with you and are supportive and they need you as much as you need them. Don't let someone starting brush fires get to you. At the same time, if someone harasses you or gives you a hard time, it is important to voice it...it needs to be discussed and aired and as importantly you need the support and an opportunity to talk about it. Talking openly may also discourage others from sending private harassing emails. That is just not proper. You also deserve our support when this happens to you. Don't ever fall for the trap of someone trying to weigh your suffering against theirs, it cannot reasonably be done.
Something I once read. Victor Frankl wrote it; "A (person's) suffering is similar to the behaviour of gas. If a certain quantity of gas is pumped into an empty chamber, it will fill the chamber completely and evenly, no matter how big the chamber. Thus suffering completely fills the human soul and conscious mind, no matter whether the suffering is great or little. "
Tidbits; "Suffering is a private, subjective, isolating, and, at times, unshareable experience. As Eric J. Cassell reflected within a medical context: ...most often we assume suffering in another not because we know it to be true, but because we would suffer in the same circumstances. While that may be false compassion, we could not exercise it unless we shared or could conceive of sharing the same universe of facts, values, and aesthetics. Everyday knowledge of suffering and compassion is possible because of our similarities with other persons...Suffering is necessarily private because it is ultimately individual. It is possible to know the suffering of others, to help them, and to relieve their distress, but never to become one with their torment"
"If there is a natural sympathy for one another in human nature, then another's suffering should elicit a response of one kind or another (for example, solidarity or indifference). The lack of compassion that is common in many responses may be a product of distorted nurturing. How much indifference to the plight of another is due to being nurtured, or socialised, into intolerance and separation? In other words, to what extent do rewards of affirmation and affection effect one's choices about for whom one cares or does not care. Suffering requires an answer. Responsibility as a moral answer to the question which suffering demands is based upon an affirmation of the unique value of the individual and the interdependent relationship they have with one another. Both responsibility and response have the same root, respondere, meaning `to answer'. In other words, to be responsible requires a readiness to respond. In this sense, responsibility is not simply a duty imposed from the outside, but is a response to a request about which one feels concern"
" ... it is important that any study about the relationship of suffering to morality honour people's sense of their own distress - as they define it. Suffering is in many ways defined by people themselves. Consequently, definitions should remain descriptive tools rather than become prescriptive criteria. Too many personal accounts of suffering feel compelled to begin their assessment of oppression by validating those experiences of suffering which are perceived to have been excluded or denied by the definitions or action of others"