"Palmer, Todd" wrote:
> Oh Karla,
> I just got to work and read your letter. I know now more than ever that we are all truley connected. Your words of pain and anguish have reach through the computer and squeezed my heart. I sit here crying at my desk for your eomtional and physical losses. I cry for all of us and the things that we too have lost due to this dreadful, relentless disease. It knows no race, creed or color and leaves a path of emotional and physical destruction in it's wake.
>
> I know that this is such a difficult time for you and your family right now. Karla, your daughter can surround herself with friends, family, and even her own husband, but NO ONE can EVER take the place of her mother. She desparately needs you right now. I too have suffered many losses in my family (6 in 18 months, sister, father, grandmother-the hardest 3). We have all reached an agreement in my family. For the first month following a loss, nothing that is said out of anger or anything said that is hurtful, counts! We know that emotions were running high and the things we would say sometimes were just awful. We never meant any of it. If anything good has ever come out of one of our many losses, it is the fact that we all treasure the time that we do have together. I've learned the cold hard fact that we never know when our time is up.
> Your daughter isn't resentful of you, it's the disease she loathes. I am not mad at my dad for leaving me, it's the cancer I hate for taking him. Don't worry about what might have been, rather concentrate on what might be. Just because she is an adult doesn't mean that she stopped needing you. I am 36 and when I need someone to talk to, I always call my mom. She is the most wonderful woman I know. That's not to say that there haven't been tifts between us at times, but reality takes hold an I realize that mom was right in the first place. She asked you not to have the surgery. That tells me that she is deeply afraid of losing you. You mean more to her that you think that you do. You sound like a warm, loving, caring, compasionate person. I am sure that you passed those wualities on to her. Don't feel discourage because of the past. Your prescence there will help her in ways that nothing else can.
> Karla, you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. I really mean that.
> And one more thing, I never post anymore but read everyday. If I don't, my hubby gets mad because of all of my e-mails from here. We are all here to help eachother. Your letter compelled me to write. You made me access my relationships again ( I was slacking a bit). We never know if something we say will help someone else, even if they don't respond. I myself am a watcher. It takes a lot for me to respond but your letter did the trick! Please don't leave us. This unsettledness shall pass!
> Much Love and Prayers,
> Lisa
>